Dealing with Financial Aid Offices

I think that subject tops my list of things that are not fun, beating out: "having a root canal" & "waiting at the DMV." This is the 2nd time in my life that I have had to deal with complete stupidity from a financial aid office and guess what, I have yet to have real interaction with them. I have called every office at every campus and left a message. I have sent an e-mail to Financial Aid Help 3 times. No responses. So, tomorrow my unhappy self will most likely be chewing out some unsuspecting financial aid "adviser," because of the overall office's incompetence.

And what may be the issue, you ask? Well, the financial aid department has a SAP policy that uses a 67% completion rate as making significant progress through coursework. Which it should; however, they should also have the responsibility to make sure that it is being correctly utilized. Because, I have 3 classes that conclude on February 12th and have 3 that have been completed their system views the 3 as not being complete and as not making significant progress. Huh? Really? Seems like a simple fix overall, right? Well, add in the complications of reaching ANYONE it becomes not so simple.

How a campus can offer classes with varying start and end dates in a semester and also have a financial aid department that does not know how to appropriately handle the situation is beyond me. I am beginning to think that these are:

Top 5 Things Taught To a New Financial Aid Employee

1. NEVER, under any circumstance, answer your office phone.
2. If you listen to voicemail, please take at least 3 days before considering your response.
3. If it is important enough the student will come to your office.
4. Make sure you take sedatives before dealing with angry student mobs.
5. Don't worry about e-mails, let the auto-response pacify their concerns.

So, now I am going to have myself a good laugh about this situation, because I love that someone or something out there cares enough to mess with me. Thank you, omnipotent being!